On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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