i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
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