Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
Randomize
