HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
You can't just leave with hair like that
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
PANTIES FOUND
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