In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
