Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
Randomize
