I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize
