Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
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