Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Randomize
