The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Randomize