I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
one might say we're banned from that church
We named our party play list daddy issues
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
I licked your asshole in confidence.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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