please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
You left your underwear on the fireplace
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
