with your own penis?
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
