Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
Just took my morning after pill in the library
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
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