you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
Randomize
