Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
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