I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
Randomize