I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
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