No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
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