is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize
