Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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