3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
I'm passing your future prison.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
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