Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
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