it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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