Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Randomize
