Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
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