Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
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