You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
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