No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
