yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
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