Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
