It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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