K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
Randomize