the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize