I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
Randomize
