No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
Randomize
