So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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