this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
