That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
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