white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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