butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
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