week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize