Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
My Uber driver last night was driving a taxi and tried to charge me fare.
You didn't get in your Uber because your ex was driving, that was a legitimate taxi.
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
Randomize