Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize
