I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
Randomize
