How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Randomize
