I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
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