elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
Houston, we have a squirter
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
Randomize
