Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
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