Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
I love you. Go after that dick
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
Randomize
