Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
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